Emoji
Assorted Poems, Selected poems
language
Hear, They’re and Everywear
Assorted Poems, Selected poemsI here that their everywear,
those people who don’t know
there their from they’re.
It where’s me down,
they’re choice of word;
there grammar should not be scene
but herd.
Divided by a Common Language
Assorted Poems, Selected poemsAmericans,
I have news to report;
i have done the math
and you are one letter short.
Perhaps
you should borrow the one
from the end of sports.
Comma
Assorted Poems, Selected poemsHow, great,
to, be, a, comma,
and, separate,
one, word, fromma,
nother.
Exclamation Mark!
Assorted Poems, Selected poemsMark was his name!
He would shout and proclaim!
Every sentence he wrote
would end just the same!
He would assert! He would blurt!
He would ejaculate and spurt!
Each line was a screamer!
A gasper! A slammer! A shrieker!
A literary loudspeaker!!!
Frankly, it all began to needle and nark!
Why did no one think to question Mark?
The Pedents’ Re-volt
Assorted Poems, Selected poemsIts not eazy being a pedent
correcting others’ mis-takes all daylong
My freinds and me are totally sic
of observing gramma witch has gone wrong.
“Whom are these language offenders”?,
“could it be that I maybe one, to”
Their ignorant; stupid, and careless:
off gramma they have’nt a clue.
They’re speling is sutch an embarrasment
its’ amature, wired, and, abserd,
comprized of neither thought or intelligance,
to a dictionary they should of refered.
Writing down there awkwardly formed sentences,
the participle clauses are left dangling.
just made one less mistake each would have the affect
to dramatically reduce this language mangling.
The Grammar Police
Assorted Poems, Selected poemsthe grammar police got him
split his infinitive open,
removed his colon
and left him lying commatose
the next day he was pronouned dead
full stop
