Let Sleeping Cats Lie

Assorted Poems

Some news! I have a new book of poems for children coming out in a couple of months – Let Sleeping Cats Lie.


It’s a collection of poems about pets (dogs, cats, goldfish, chinchilla, guinea pigs, snakes, budgies, rabbits, blue whales etc). I say it’s for children but it’s also suitable for grandchildren and, who knows, some grown-ups might enjoy it, too; I don’t like to be too prescriptive.


It publishes on 26th September in the UK. If you fancied pre-ordering a copy, you can do so through your local bookshop or visiting this page with links to some online booksellers:
https://www.panmacmillan.com/authors/brian-bilston/let-sleeping-cats-lie-pet-poems/9781035050550

Here’s a poem from the collection:

Wilf the Labracadabrador

Wilf the Labracadabrador
(who in dog years is seventy-six)

is a magician, a conjurer
and a hypnotist.

He saws teddies in half.
He pulls rabbits from hats.

He makes all his food vanish,
just like that.

Renowned for his showdogship
and smooth sleight of paw,

Wilf’s about to em-bark
on a nationwide tour.

Last week, I showed him
how to juggle with sticks.

Whoever said you can’t teach
an old dog new tricks?

Solo shows for 2024

News

I’m doing a few solo poetry shows this year, starting this month with Chester, Lincoln & Scarborough.

I’ll be in Falmouth, Totnes & Launceston in April. And Belfast & Dublin in October.

If you fancy coming along to a show, you can get tickets here: https://brianbilston.com/events/

Mnemonic

Assorted Poems, Selected poems

Thirty days hath September,
April, June and November.
Unless a leap year is its fate,
February hath twenty-eight.
All the rest hath three days more,
excepting January,
which hath six thousand,
one hundred and eighty-four.

2024 Shows (warning: may contain poetry)

News

Well done, everybody, for making it to January 569th.

I’ve been grateful for those extra days this month, as it’s given me time to get my head together for my 2024 shows, which begin in just over two weeks’ time with a run of dates with the fabulous poet (and human) Henry Normal. We start on 16th February in Bexhill-on-Sea on the south coast.

Places and dates

Shows in Nottingham and Monmouth have now sold out – alongside Salford, Leeds, Exeter, Bath, Stroud and Leek.

There are only a handful of tickets remaining for London, Oxford, Bury St Edmunds, Coventry and Ilkley.

Tickets are also on sale for Sunderland, Barrow, Wolverhampton, Norwich, Berwick-upon-Tweed, Stirling, Aberdeen, Dundee, Edinburgh, Glasgow, plus two new shows announced last week: Bristol and Southampton.

And a small reminder that I’m doing a few solo shows this year in fancy coming along to one: Chester, Lincoln, Scarborough, Falmouth, Totnes, Launceston, Belfast and Dublin.

More places and dates

If you came to see me last year and for some strange reason are considering coming along again, then you might be reassured to know I’ll be reading a bunch of new poems (alongside a few older ones). There’s a guarantee of a least two new jokes or your money back (terms and conditions apply*).

Links to more information and tickets can be found on this page: 2024 shows and ticket info

* Brian Bilston reserves the right to define what constitutes a joke. A joke may not always be dependent on laughter.

 

 

2024 Tour

News

In the last few days, I’ve read poems in Ely, Birmingham, St Andrews, Edinburgh and Brighton; each event was lovely and special in its own way. A big thank you to everyone who came along to them, and indeed, to all the 15,000 people who have dragged themselves to my 59 shows this year.

In terms of 2024, a couple of new dates have been added:
BARROW-in FURNESS (19 Feb – with Henry Normal): TICKETS HERE
and a second evening of my solo show in SCARBOROUGH (22 March): TICKETS HERE

For my shows with Henry Normal, these ones are selling like hotcakes: BURY ST EDMUNDS, EXETER, LEEDS, LONDON, SALFORD and STROUD, so you might need to be quick if you fancy coming along.

Tickets for these ones are selling like warm buns: BATH, COVENTRY, MONMOUTH, NOTTINGHAM, OXFORD and SUNDERLAND, so I wouldn’t wait too long.

And these ones could do with some heating up: ABERDEEN, BEXHILL-ON-SEA, DUNDEE, EDINBURGH, GLASGOW, ILKLEY, NORWICH, STIRLING, WOLVERHAMPTON.

And just a reminder that I’ve got a few solo shows next year, too: BELFAST, CHESTER, DUBLIN, FALMOUTH, LAUNCESTON, LINCOLN, SCARBOROUGH, TOTNES.

Anyway, you can find out details of ALL these shows here: https://brianbilston.com/events/

Finally, would tickets to one of these make a nice gift for somebody this Christmas?*

I couldn’t possibly comment.

* YES

A few tickets available for this week …

News

Thanks very much to everyone who braved the elements to come and see me in Banbury, Stamford, Pocklington, Liverpool and Otley last week. Your dedication is to be much admired.

This week I’m mainly in Wales – in Caerphilly on Thursday and Crickhowell in the Brecon Beacons on Friday. There are a few tickets left for both shows. If you fancy coming along, then ticket info can be found through this link: https://brianbilston.com/upcoming-events-and-shows/

I’m then heading to Clevedon on Saturday before popping home to do my laundry.

Also, apart from one more return trip to Liverpool next month, that’s the end of my shows in the north of England this year. If you didn’t get a chance to get a ticket – or fancy coming along to a brand new show next year, then I’ll be heading to Leeds, Salford, Sunderland, Ilkley, Leek and Nottingham with Henry Normal – and doing a few solo shows in Scarborough, Chester and Lincoln*.

*Please note, other shows are available.

Autumn and Spring shows

News

Thanks to everyone who has come along to my shows so far this Autumn. Most of you have even come back after the interval, which is very kind and forgiving of you.

Next week I’m in Banbury, Stamford, Pocklington, Liverpool and Otley. They’re all sold out, I’m afraid, but there are a few tickets left for the following week – in Caerphilly and Crickhowell. After that, the only other shows with tickets available this year are Frome and Bridport.

And just to say that some of my 2024 shows with Henry Normal are selling very quickly – particularly Exeter, Glasgow, Leeds, London, Nottingham, Oxford, Salford and Bury St Edmunds – so if you’re thinking of coming along to any of those, you may need to get your tickets soon.

A full list of shows – and links to tickets can be found here: https://brianbilston.com/upcoming-events-and-shows/

Warning: this post contains the C word

News

Is it too early to be thinking about Christmas?

Almost certainly, yes.

Is this year going to be THE year in which you get all your shopping sorted way ahead of time?

Probably not, no.

Is there a book publishing today which could solve many of your Christmas shopping headaches?

No idea, tbh.

Regardless, I thought I should probably let you know that I have a new book coming out today. It’s a collection of Christmas poems called And So This is Christmas.

Poems cover most of the festive basics, such as: the likelihood of snow; secret Santa shopping; family tensions; the voting habits of turkeys; the difficulty of getting hold of some myrrh; disruptions to the regular bin schedule; bloody robins.

Oh, and the commercialization of Christmas, of course.

If it wasn’t too early to be thinking about Christmas, I would tell you that the book is available through all bookshops – online stores and proper ones. I’d probably also share this link, which provides links to some of the bookshops through which you can order it online:

https://linktr.ee/brianbilston

I might also mention that the paperback of Days Like These will be publishing in just under a month and that also might serve as a Christmas gift for someone for whom you don’t want to go to much effort.

But given it’s only 12th October, I probably shouldn’t. In fact, best just to disregard all of the above; I wish I hadn’t mentioned it now.

Days Like These in North America

News

At last! I’m delighted to announce that my most recent book Days Like These is finally available for pre-order in North America. It will officially publish there in hardcover on 5th December and is available through all good bookstores and also Amazon.

It contains a poem for every day of the year, each one inspired by an event associated with that day – from the invention of television to World Bee Day; from the first appearance of Barbie to the banning of flirting in New York; from Independence Day to the first transatlantic phone call.

Subjects I’ve written about along the way include: quarks, morse code, Wittgenstein, bananas, unicorns, the unification of Italy, the Rubik’s Cube, water, Waiting for Godot, the moon, Jane Austen, Esperanto, beer, Doris Day, Lego, kindness, Pluto (the ex-planet not the dog) and Elvis.

Days Like These joins You Took the Last Bus Home, Alexa, what is there to know about love? and Refugees in being available in North America.

Sorry to mention the C word but my book of Christmas poems– And So This is Christmas –  which publishes in the UK in October won’t be available in print in North America until next year (presumably to prevent too much excitement happening in any one year).

And for those of you outside of North America, Days Like These publishes in paperback on 9th November: https://uk.bookshop.org/a/295/9781035001668