On Hearing the News that You’re a Great Big Loser

Schadenfreude is an ugly trait,
to enjoy another’s ill-starred fate.
In the sea of life, we’re all storm-tossed,
and yet … ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, you lost!

I don’t quite know what happened there:
to laugh at losers isn’t fair.
To win with grace, that’s best by far,
but … ha, ha, tee-hee! Ha, ha, ha!

I apologise for that outburst
but it just slipped out, unrehearsed.
I need to show more dignity.
However … ha, ha, ha! Tee-hee-hee!

Ha! Laughter is a wondrous thing!
What a gift – tee-hee! – of joy you bring!
You’ve brightened up – ha ha! – my day.
Ha ha, tee-hee! … now go away.


  1. The red wind doth blow,
    The US says “NO!”
    And what will The Donald do then, poor thing?
    He’ll tan up his face,
    Keep running the race,
    And sue his opponents and friends, poor thing.

    The red wind doth blow,
    The US says “NO!”
    And what will Ivanka do then, poor thing?
    She’ll preach for pro-life,
    Stay a Stepford wife,
    And to daddy’s name she will cling, poor thing.

    The red wind doth blow,
    The US says “NO!”
    And what will Melania do then, poor thing?
    With no more free rides,
    To the gutter she’ll slide,
    But she really doesn’t care…do you?

  2. That’s deeper than it appears at first glance, Mr. Bilston. Very cleverly done.


    I am an admirer, I like your style.
    I read your poems – they make me smile
    and sniffle when they’re sad or grim,
    like that poor fridge-obsessed house penguin
    of yours. But this is not why I am writing.

    I would like to pick your brain.
    Please allow me to explain:
    Since publishing involves not only you
    but your proofreader and editor too,
    can their “personal taste” be a tricky thing?

    How do you handle it if they
    find flaws in your poems along the way?
    What if they don’t like your writing at all
    and have concluded that it’s abysmal?
    Your answer will be enlightening.

    Do you switch editors, or do you rewrite
    what you have done, in this negative light?
    Can unconscious bias cause your editors
    to err in their job as ”co-creators”?
    (I’m serious about this, not kidding.)

    I’m asking because I’m writing a post,
    and would like to quote the poet who I like the most.
    I could send you in prose a proper enquiry,
    If I knew the email, and thank you sincerely
    in advance for responding.

    1. Ha! What a creative way to ask a question. Thanks so much. I don’t really want to put my email address up directly on here so if you can let me know yours, I’ll send you an email.

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