Broken down?
Only a hard shoulder to cry on?
Reach not for the RAC or the Samaritans.

Minds and machinery mended.
A sonnet will be pinned softly
to your bonnet.


Injured at work?
Crushed by falling scaffolding
or the inbox ennui of office life?

You may be entitled to
an Ode to Compensation.


At death’s door?
Failing fast in your hospital bed?
No friends or family to comfort you?

The poet will arrive at turtleneck speed
to deliver a sweet, sweet eulogy
at your funeral.


£10 a poem.
Please add 50p for extras*

*Extras include rhyme, scansion,
and profound insights into the human condition.

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