Instructions
Please choose the haiku
which applies the most to you.
Choose two get one free.
I
Subbuteo man.
Legs broken. Re-glued twice.
A fragile sadness.
II
A leaf, desolate,
wind-blown, stuck to the back of
Bruce Forsyth’s toupée.
III
A note left hanging
in the cold night air, dispatched
from a flugelhorn.
IV
Unclaimed bag revolves
on a lonely carousel
A hopeless case.
V
Empty, vacant box
in someone else’s org chart.
Never to be filled.
VI
Imperfect haiku,
starts off quite well but ends one
syllable short.
VII
A tranquil puddle
into which splashes one of
Clarkson’s driving gloves.
VIII
A semi-colon
in a place where it really;
has no place to be.
IX
Reality show
contestant on a journey
back home to Skegness.
X
A smell which lingers,
vaguely reminiscent of
Adrian Chiles’ socks.
XI
The forlorn pathos
of an abandoned crossword
in a bin in Fife.
XII
A bag of Quavers,
offering cheesy comfort
but steeped in staleness.